Unravelling

I’m Unravelling.

No, I’m not losing my grip on reality. I’ve begun to unravel and defuse unwanted and negative memories. They haven’t just gone away by themselves—rather—my subconscious, that powerful BLACK BOX inside all of our brains, has begun to unwind them and cut the strings. This has begun happening over the last few months while dreaming. And thankfully for me, I have always managed to remember—and dissect—my dreams, trusting that omnipotent subconscious mind which brings them into focus for inspection and introspection. It has long been known that the “Black Box” of the brain stores everything….fond memories, horrific experiences, even the faintest of smells. Just like the flight recorder the NTSB uses to discover clues into every detail of a plane’s flight, so too, does our brain’s recorder. Dr. Eagleman, a well- known neuroscience researcher revered for his study in the intricacies of the brain, has said that the conscious brain can be likened to a broom closet in the mansion of the unconscious mind. Pretty powerful words. For me, this awakening of my unconscious has helped to offload some of the baggage I’ve been carrying around, and through dreams, bringing them to the fore-front, thus allowing me to decide what’s worth keeping and what’s not. For example, recently I dreamed I confronted an uncle that had sexually abused me for over 6 years as a young girl. I yelled at him, told him off, shamed him for the creep he really was. In another, I re-lived the pain I had long repressed during my ex-husband’s cheating and our eventual divorce. In both cases, I felt I’d cut these ties, as I dealt with them in a way I could not have done consciously. There have been others, as well, revealing aspects I knew, but wouldn’t accept. I can now. Sleep has now become a new frontier and one I look forward to exploring courageously albeit a bit trepidatiously.

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2 thoughts on “Unravelling

  1. So powerful…I agree that it seems like the subconscious leaks bits of difficult memories in small doses for us to deal with and discard. For many, that Black Box you mention can be sealed shut so tight for our own best interest and the for the sake of daily mental health. But we know its there. We know it harbors delight and destruction and almost like a Pandora’s box, its not worth the risk to open. I’m glad to hear that your subconscious has decided that it is time to do some spring cleaning, one sleep at a time…

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